I'll blow up at you again. And I'll also keep hurting you since I'm not willing to stop sleeping with others when I know you'll never be fully mine.

I want to be better but I can't discard it. All these negative thoughts swirling my head, the doubts and the fear. It takes over and I can't hold it back. I didn't want to catch you in it.

And I shouldn't have told you about Haruki either.